We visited a shamanic island in tribal gathering 2019. Panama was more than we expected. The land, the indigenous, the ocean and the beautiful people with open hearts. It feels like coming home. That all of us somehow travelled all the way to heal, collectively, individually. We walk through the islands barefoot. The weather was cooperating – no mosquito, no coldness. It is all warm and welcoming. The mind that seek for comfort is still here.
Land it onto mother’s belly, she inquires us to listen and learn from each other. I ask myself, what can I be of service for the community? I was so out of my alignment getting lost in devil’s illusions. I see people sharing their skills, compassion and love, I realized I need to offer my tired feet a seat, let myself grief, so I can move to other side. The spirits were around this place, taking care of the human in vulnerable descent.
The festival was full of rituals and ancestral wisdom – we make the drum and flute, weave the eye of god, make tree people from the earth, dance, sing, making fire, pray, sit our ass right on the ground in a circle, with everyone. It feels right and proper. It feels like a need that I have long forgotten and do not know why I feel so lost.
I was there by myself as well as with my dear love Christian. There, we learned to go on for our treasure haunting, sometimes together, sometimes apart, following our own interests. I learned from a woman about the butoh and the authentic movement. That’s where I would bring in the Brahman project.
There is a Paradise. Yet it is inevitably impacted by the global pollution – the ocean is carrying plastic and trash with tides. To think of the impact we can create through our actions was necessary and emergency. How can we make the waste into the beauty and sustainable? I ask myself to learn about the way of sustainability. There are local people making local food, shamans and elders of tribes to speak with and learn from, system that one can exchange labor for token/ food, meaning we all come together as a global society to appreciate and be of service for each other. To be able to offer myself to serve a cup a tea for all that wonderful souls is tremendously transformative. Such simple joy that I have long forgotten in the soul-crashing capital system that we all might overlook its impact on us.
That was the first part of the story.
I moved myself outside of Berlin for a month in that following summer onto the beautiful land of Ponderosa. A dance community that offers retreat, training, planting and all kind of creativity.
My adventure was set to live in my own tent, and exchange my labor in the kitchen for lower cost. The backyard was all peaceful and quiet. I woke up every day at seven o’clock along the roaster and horses to catch up a hot tea on the balcony before the yoga start.
We practice mudra in the morning, asana after the breakfast. I was honored to share the tarot practice I have cultivated since Panama with others. There is a canal where a river spirit lives. A dive in the afternoon was a blissful experience.
In the night, there was all kind of performances, jam and activities to immerse myself in art of movements – object jam, cello plays in the garden and so much more. One can be prepared to feed its seven senses. As well as the right clothing to keep the body warm, and an open heart to be.
To continue our journey to knowing Self and co-living with our community – We were delighted and honored to be invited to Brahman in California desert in February 2020. The desert is of a beast itself where we need to learn the way of it. It is astoundingly beautiful.
I finally arrived the place after three days of silent retreat. It was uneasy to realize how difficult for me to find my own voice and place here in nowhere, yet consistently around people and the group activities. The journey is full of challenges. It is good. We are here to learn.
I am one of the later comer for the project has begun in January, There are no expectation on how we engage with this place. It is completely organic. One can decide how and how much one would like to involve. People come up with their own ideas, team up with others or not, contribute time and labor to build our Mars. The freedom comes so rapidly that one suddenly is not sure what to do about it.
The lesson to homing whenever and wherever and brewing one’s dreams was blessed by the whole desert to explore, dance and spin, inspiring people with big hearts, the living space of one’s own choice, and the spoiling delicious meal every day. After the rain and sand storm, I had decided to share the authentic movements with others no matter how the weather would be the next day. It was not the first time, neither would not be the last.
To witness a group of soul melting in front of the eyes of witness, is something I would never get tired to look at. Right on the portal of Mars, there is the trace of us drawing down the movements they had experienced in the workshop. I would never forget we all silently melt in all kind of texture among the trees, sharing our feelings after a cacao ceremony.
End of the story; we come home to our Self with our childSelf. We can make our life better by integrating all that lessons we learned far away from home as well as right here in our mundane life.